Thursday, January 31, 2013

I'm Baa'aaa'ck!

It has been so long since I last wrote a post I almost forgot how to log in.

Has it really been since September?  So much has happened since then.  The rams were put in with the ewes for breeding, we are expecting the spring crop of lambs to start popping out mid March.  We are helping the McBrides, across the street with their sheep and their first lamb arrived today. 



A very large & healthy ewe lamb.  I was relieved it was a ewe lamb, because I doubt very much that Brenda will ever part with this lamb.




We have all survived the past 6 months intact.  Although, just barely. 

My adult daughter moved home with her 2 y/o daughter Alyssa so she could attend college without the worry and stress of working full time.  Then my youngest son moved back home and he is also enrolled in college full time.  My middle son with schizophrenia went missing for a while, was homeless on the streets, then popped up in a local hospital close to death in the ICU.  After a scary couple of weeks we have him in an appropriate facility and things are looking up. 

Needless to say, after 8 years with out a cigarette...I started smoking again.  Does that give you an indication of how stressful the last few months have been?  To be outside in freezing temperatures just to have a nicotine fix is NOT pleasant, combined with what I am doing to my health?  NOT GOOD. 

Obviously, I am trying to quit...right after my next cigarette. Or heart attack, which ever comes first. 

I sat down and thought about the things in my life that have helped me with stress, one has been this blog.  I am not sure why I stopped blogging.  Perhaps it was resentment?  Pressuring myself, feeling obligated to come up with the next great post and the hours I spent on photography was becoming tedious.

That said, I need something to help me keep track of things.  Accomplishments, goals, hopes & dreams.  Even the occasional screw up. Let's face it, I am old, hence blood flow is lacking to my brain.  My memory is shot to hell thanks to menopause (and now smoking - hack hack ACK).  I need this blog to keep track of my life, because one day I am going to forget everything. 

Who am I? 

Where was I?

MOVING ON.....I may need to change the name of this blog, again.

We have a new addition.

This puppy I can blame entirely on Dianne Deal.  She twisted my arm.

Ironically the day before I had been talking to my therapist about following my bliss.  Keeping my eye on the goal and focused on what will make me happy, what gives me peace and what is my "Bliss".  That afternoon I posted this sign on Facebook - it spoke to me.

I have been following my bliss, with out really thinking about it.  It is what led me to where I am today, at the farm, with the sheep, my dogs and friends that surround me.  My life has fundamentally changed for the better - by following my bliss.   


The next morning, Dianne emailed me a picture of an adorable little puppy she named Bliss.  She had not seen my post on Facebook or had any idea what I had been working on in therapy.

That my friends, is what I like to call a divine co-inky-dink and it spoke to me - directly to my heart, beyond all rational thought, I no longer could be held responsible for my actions.

At least that is what I tell my husband.  I do not think he subscribes to my conspicuous thought process - skeptical is his middle name.  Alas, he was won over....I think.  He may just be laying in wait to claim his due at a later date.  I tell him that there is a special place in heaven for men like him.  With golden fishing poles, silver rivers full of fish, and no wives with dogs, and sheep - that keep multiplying.  Then I hand him a beer and turn on the football game.  He is happy.

I digress...   

Meet Bliss a 12 week old border collie puppy.  The easiest puppy ever.  I have never had a puppy that will go noodle limp when I pick her up.  She just melts into you, snuggles right up to your neck and sighs.  With all that she is still a very confident little sprite.  This one will be FUN!  


Bliss is related to Bea.  Her mother, Penny (Bett x Riggs) is Bea's full sister from a previous litter. 


Her father is Dianne Deal's Zorro (Byrnes Ted x Lynn).  He is related to Brynn.


Bliss will be a smooth coat, which I love.  Now that I have dogs that work outside every day & sleep in the house at night - I will never go back to a long/traditional coat ever again. 

Her temperment speaks to my heart.  She reminds me of Brynn as a puppy.

Speaking of Brynn - we are slowly but surely making progress.  You wouldn't know it by our trial scores - but I am figuring lots of stuff out, you know the whole two steps forward and three back routine.   Hopefully, one day before I die I can actually walk off the field feeling pretty damn good. 

Bea went back to Dianne's for training in December.  I will be seeing her next weekend when we go to Idaho for El Presidente SDT. 

The sheep are due to start lambing mid march.  We decided that lambing in the snow was NOT FUN and did not want to repeat last year's insanity.  We have two groups of ewes that were bred.  I have narrowed down my breeding objectives and have goals in mind for the flock.  I am concentrating on my registered romney's and border leicesters.  Been doing pretty good selling bred ewes already this fall.  All the customers are very happy with them and the prices have been better than expected.  Word of mouth seems to be the way to go.  I had to pull my ad off of Craigslist because I was going to have to start selling the ewes I wanted to keep.  

Doris is our very intelligent, yet near sighted ewe on our farm.  Glasses seem to help.  We need to work on the fit though. 



I love sheep.  Is that evident yet?

They may or may not be fond of me.  The other day I was walking to the back of the property, I turned around and all of this was behind me.


It could either make me feel loved or they just see me as the source to primo food.  I prefer to think it is the latter.  Love through the tummy.  It is the way I roll.

Doris rolls with about anything I do to her.  She is a slave to the scritches.


Sheep noses are so velvety soft and sweet. 



Speaking of sheep....

Back in November I started making these sheep statues from epoxy resin/clay, reclaimed wood and fleece from our sheep and the Jonasson Border Leicester farm.  All the ones you see in the picture below have been sold.  I am working on more and will be bringing many with me to Idaho for the trial and the rest will be posted on my Etsy shop. 


You can find them on Etsy at Bless Ewe Sheep Company

Enough yammering for tonight.

See ya :)



Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Floss Anyone?

"I don't have many teeth left. What teeth I do have I keep in tip-top shape. Regular flossing is recommended. I prefer to use sheep wool to floss. It is quick and effective. When I forget to floss at home before leaving for work, I can just lean over and take a big bite of sheep wool and viola, beautiful clean chompers & healthy gums. I enjoy letting it hang out of my mouth too, it is fun to suck on. Keeps those wooly bitches out of my grill. Reminds them that I AM QUEEN!"



"Camera face chose to leave the giant sheep turd next to me, instead of editing it out, because it illustrated the rough and tough working dog story. I bite sheep and work in shit. Yes, I am a hard ass Queen."

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Goals?

The other day someone asked me "What are your goals with the dogs and sheep?"

I have to admit, I didn't have an answer at the ready. 

Goals? 

When I first started this 'journey' it was about trialing and getting better, bigger, faster, pushing myself, pushing my dog,  pushing pushing pushing.  It took some healthy introspection about why I was being competitive and just what I was out to prove. 

I am not a competitive person.  I am a pleaser.  Big difference there.  Both are rooted in ego, although the path is slightly different. 

Who was I trying to please? My trainer? My husband? My friends? Me?

Certainly not my dog.  She could care less if we ever go to a trial again.

 

Was I trying to please myself?  In a bizzare way, perhaps. More than anything I believe I have been trying to prove something. 

Trials scare the crap out of me.  Yes, it is good for my social phobia to put myself out there in public, but most of the time I feel like I made an idiot out of myself.  Then I go home and over-think every interaction and make myself miserable for a week.   And this is before I ever get to the post. 



At a trial I feel terribly alone.  It is not much fun and putting that kind of pressure on myself and Brynn, just sucks. 

I backed off of the trials.  Started to chose only the trials and situations that will be a good experience for my dog.  My perspective changed from wanting to expose my dog to every trial under the sun, to protecting her and managing those exposures.  In doing so, I am protecting myself too.  The first time I have ever done that.  It is a new experience. 

I am learning how to see a trial as simply a measure of where we are.  Nothing more, nothing less.  In the big scheme of things, no one gives a sh*t.   They really don't.  Heck, I can barely remember a trial run of our own from a year ago, let alone anyone elses.

My focus and desires have changed from being all about my dogs to now being about my sheep AND dogs.  The dogs are happier. I am happier.

What are my goals for my sheep? 

Continue learning about this business.  Ensure my sheep are healthy, cared for and content. 

One thing I have learned about myself is how much I enjoy nurturing and caring for the flock.  To see the sheep growing, gaining weight, shining bright eyes, full beautiful fleeces - just brings a smile to my face. 



It makes me realize how much I have missed my children since they have grown.  Fixing meals, talking over dinner, sharing our days, giving them a bath and tucking them into bed with a story. 



Perhaps I have transferred that need to nurture and care for someone from my kids as they grew up, to the dogs and now the sheep. 



I just know that I am at peace with the flock & my dogs.  



What are my goals? 

To get out of bed tomorrow. 
To care for myself, my family, my dogs and my sheep.  
Anything else will be taken a minute, an hour, a day at a time.  




Be happy in the moment - that's enough
Each moment is all we need - not more.  
~Mother Teresa


Thursday, September 6, 2012

Shades

Her future's so bright, she's gotta wear shades...

Or maybe her shepherds tenuous grasp on reality is so frail she simply cannot bear to watch.

Whichever it is, this girl rocks her shades.


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Summer Break has Ended

As you all have noticed I took a long break from blogging.

I had to. It was necessary to maintain the rather tenuous grasp I have on what is left of my sanity.

Much introspection and over-thinking has followed. Compounding this absence is a profound iPhone addiction to Facebook which eliminated any urge to blog. I could be outside, surf FB on my phone. Even in the middle of the pasture while moving sheep. Absolutely positive the last thing I wanted to do was to be locked to my computer for any length of time. Yuck.

Then my favorite lens of all time Is dying a slow and painful death. Which has put my photography goals out of whack. In addition to just pissing me off to no end.

August has been busier than a cold virus on a toddlers nose. We held a small trial at our farm at the beginning of August. Have worked close to full time at the farm on other projects.

A new llama arrived. Then she and Jim needed to be sheared, trimmed and vaccinated.

Then we have had the cougar attacks. Followed with working with Fish and Wildlife attempting to trap the cougar which has been leaving a trail of dead livestock behind. Unfortunately we didn't catch anything in the trap other than Beth.

New sheep arrived.

Have been working on obtaining a 110 acre hay field for future trials. Had to mow our pastures and the one across the street.

Just normal stuff.

Birthdays, baby time, dog time, friends and a couple parties. I was too tired to blog.

Now I think I have some happiness back. Ready to blog for me. I will need it to look back on when I am to far gone with dementia. Will be nice to have some memories that will make me giggle, wipe the drool away, and remember that once I had the time of my life.

Oh and the cool new Blogger iPhone app. Now I can blog from my phone. Yippee!

It is good to be back. I missed ewe.